This much we know...

If you are going to put a crib together do one of two things. Measure or get measurements of said crib and know if it will fit through the halls and doors that you need it to. Or construct the crib in the room in which you plan to leave it. If you don't follow these two simple rules you will find yourselves as we did...trying to fit a crib down the hall (snug fit but it worked) and through the door in which there was no way it would fit. Thus leading us to take it apart in order to fit it through the door and then put it back together once inside the room. Oh boy! What a fun little ordeal...at least we were laughing. At least now we have experience for the next crib we put together.

*crib in the empty/unpainted/undecorated nursery*

*our little dog testing out the crib...I don't think he liked it*

So it begins...

I found an awesome deal on the crib that I wanted. I had seen it on Walmart.com but it was $190 and Jeff and I just couldn't see spending $400 just on the cribs (no mattresses). So we talked ourselves into the cheaper cribs for $125 and I saved them in the cart to buy later. Later came and the rollback price was bumped and they went to $135 (not bad but it got me looking again). I searched the name of the one I liked online and was able to find a site that offered them at a slightly cheaper price and an extra 20% off sale. So for the two it would be $311 (including shipping). So that made them only $20 more a piece (plus delivered right to our door not in-store pickup). Yeah!! I was happy to finally have that out of the way. I talked to Jeff and ordered them and they are on their way.

Also I am mostly finished with the dresser I have been working on for a year now. My friend, Lisa and James, her hubby, were cleaning out their basement and Lisa wanted to get rid of it and I was quick to say I would love to have it. It needed a little work but nothing serious and I could totally see a gem of a dresser (hoping in my mind at the time for a nursery down the line). I think I started on it last summer and it was a weekend project when I was off work. Then I messed up a step and had to start over. I have filled in dents, sanded it all down, painted it and antiqued it. Now I am back to just needing to clear coat it and it will be done. I hope I can do it right and that the clear coat goes on clear and it will be perfect. I love the dresser and I think it will go great with the cribs and nursery stuff.

Now I will just start brainstorming about ways to decorate. We find out what we are having on August 17th...so that will make decorating decisions easier. We're also considering going to a different doctor then the one Dr L was going to pass us onto. I hope we end up with someone we really like.

Update: We are now having the ultrasound appointment on the 19th as well as our first appointment with Dr B. I know my friend Brooke (who had twins) really liked him and likes the clinic he runs out of, also stating that they typically did an ultrasound at every appointment with her twins since things can change so quickly. I'm looking forward to meeting him but disappointed that I will not be seeing Dr L anymore. I loved her and definitely owe her a thank you before her move to Texas.

Weird feelings...

So we found out on Wednesday that my close friend with PCOS is also pregnant. We are excited for them. I'm thinking this is why they took our news of being pregnant so well and were so excited for us...because they already had an idea they were pregnant. They told us on Wednesday, not even a week after we announced the twins to them. She is 7 weeks pregnant and they claim they took a test and found out the morning after we told them but I think they've known longer. Especially since they had a "viability" type ultrasound on Tuesday...you don't test on Friday and get an ultrasound two or three days later. That and 7 weeks along and just finding out...just seems off. I am very excited for them but I just don't like the feeling of being mislead or such.

Anyway my weird feelings just come from having a small bit of jealousy. Stupid I know. Here I am happily pregnant with twins and so excited to have a family. Yet I think of her and how she can be on some medication for PCOS for like 6 months or so and end up pregnant on her own without other intervention. It makes me a little jealous. I wish there were some pill I could have taken or something that didn't cost us $20,000 and 2 years of saving and waiting. And sad to say but I actually had a little jealousy over the biological component too. Like that her body kicked in and that they made this baby the old fashioned way and that it's from both of them. I guess I thought that feeling of jealousy with normal fertile women would disappear once I was pregnant. And I hope that once we have these kiddos that the jealousy will lessen or disappear. I have no doubt that I will love these babies just as much if not more then the moms who got there easy. I'm so excited to meet them. I know that once they are here (and even now) I can't imagine having them any other way and I wouldn't change any of this and how they came to us for the world. They are meant to be ours and we are meant to be their parents. I can't wait for the day we become parents.

15 Weeks...

How far along? 14 weeks 6 days (so basically 15 weeks)

Maternity clothes? I still only have the one shirt and haven't worn it yet...I read online that "by now you are probably in maternity clothes" and I'm looking at my body going "no not really...and I've got two in there". Must be my height helping to give room to grow before I show.

Symptoms: I feel fine still...I also still get hiccups all the time (it seems like at least once a day) and I still want to throw up if I cough too much.

Stretch marks? nope

Sleep? Still sleeping good and enjoying it while I can (I wish there was a way to store sleep for later)

Best moment this week? We finally told my best friend Lisa and her husband. It went really smoothly and she's been great about things. Also our last appointment and seeing the kids and watching the one kicking and moving around (still don't feel anything).

Movement? Well we know one is pretty active but the other baby seems to usually have it's back turned to us and was happily chilling without a lot of wiggling at the ultrasound. Both were great though and could see heart beats and all that good stuff.

Food Cravings? Not really...I love milk with nesquick in it, I love crisp chicken burritos from Taco Time (but I always did) and I love chocolate muffins from WinCo (but nothing unusual or out of my ordinary likes)

Gender? No idea...I think either two boys or one of each

What I miss? I still miss my sandwiches and hot dogs look good too but nothing compared to being here :)

What I'm looking forward to? feeling the babies move, finding out the sexes and actually having a need to wear some maternity clothes hehe

Weekly Wisdom: Enjoy it in your own way (once again from my dear husband). I told him how sometimes I feel like I'm not excited enough or such especially after what we've been through to get here (like at our appointment for example) and he said that I shouldn't worry about it and just enjoy and be excited in my own way as he knows I am.

Milestones: They look like babies :) I don't know if that's a milestone but it was so awesome to see legs, fingers and toes and can't wait to see more detail at the anatomy ultrasound.

Emotions: Pretty normal still and nothing crazy...man I think I have it easy so far and I'm grateful :)

*our shy one *

*our more active woogit*

*me at 14 week 6 day...very little change*

Grateful for our luck...

I have been following blogs of many women in the infertility world. Most of them are women with POF or DOR (diminished ovarian reserve). Some of them are pregnant and some are in the various stages of DE cycles or trying other fertility treatments. Some have had failed cycles and some are trying their first time around. I've just been thinking about it and how grateful I am that we were lucky the first time around.

We had really good odds in our favor based on the quality of eggs our donor gave and also on my own health history and healthy bits (sans my ovaries of course). I remember being so stressed about the idea of it not working and feeling like it wouldn't. I felt much more at ease the day of transfer when they had better info and odds for us and also told us we would have 11 embryos to freeze. But there was still fear in my mind that it might not work or that my body might throw another wrench out there. We are sooooo grateful it worked. I feel so incredibly blessed and I wish it were like this for everyone. I can't imagine being one who's hopes are dashed despite one of the most advanced and invasive procedures you can go through to have a child.

Jeff and I had our fall-back plan. We cushioned it up nice and tight and added more to it the closer things came. It started out with getting another dog. We both love having Thor and thought we would add another fur-baby if no real baby was in store. I also determined that I would like to get a tattoo (yep Mom...you read it right). I had a triskel design picked out and the meaning that it had for me to move forward and not look back or regret the past. I told Jeff where I wanted to get it (between my shoulder blades) and even began looking at places to have it done.

*a look at what could've been

Last but not least when we were mid-cycle and realizing our hopes were hanging on this one thing we determined we would go on a cruise together if it didn't work. A big brouhaha of sorts to just enjoy each other and have a grand time.

But in the end we were one of the lucky ones. So lucky. And so grateful.

Morning sickness...now??

I hope not. I have noticed that I have been feeling more blah and queezy now then I did the first of this pregnancy. Which doesn't help. I need to be gaining weight and getting my appetite back not feeling icky. This morning I ate my breakfast of fruit loops and was about to head out the door when I had a coughing fit. For whatever reason if I cough to much lately it makes me want to gag. So I stopped coughing and tried to convince myself I felt fine but unfortunately I tossed my cookies anyway...a nice colorful rainbow. I hope I start feeling better and this is just a fluke of adjustment period.

Everything else seems to be good though. I'm excited to go to our next doctor's appointment and see another ultrasound. I hope everything is on target. I wonder a little due to the fact I haven't gained much weight if any. I'm sure it will start to catch up eventually though.

12 weeks

How far along? 12 weeks 3 days

Maternity clothes? I still only have the one shirt and haven't worn it yet

Symptoms: I feel fine...more tired but not much beyond that. I've gotten random hiccups while sleeping that wake me up the last few nights but who knows if they're related.

Stretch marks? nope

Sleep? Still sleeping good and enjoying it while I can

Best moment this week? Telling my sister, brother and sister-in-law about the babies...they were nice and excited and it was good. Unfortunately our other plan didn't go to plan so we still haven't told our closest friends.

Movement? Nope

Food Cravings? Not really...still love milk. I want sandwiches but mostly not super hungry still.

Gender? No idea

What I miss? not sure

What I'm looking forward to? another u/s on July 15th.

Weekly Wisdom: Nothing I can think of.

Milestones: Making it past the first 12 weeks and now have better odds for a good outcome :) YEAH!

Emotions: Pretty even keel...I think I might get annoyed easier but not sure.