One more week...

I am still feeling minimally pregnant. I am still cold and still a little crampy and tender but other than that nuttin. Sometimes I feel like my sniffer is starting to kick into high gear...like when the broccoli in the kitchen trash made me want to dry heave. Okay and so I am nauseous to certain things (seemingly more then I remember). Like I killed a spider tonight and I was dry heaving at the guts and clean up. But all in all I do not feel pregnant. Some days I feel like the transfer and everything was just a dream and nothing is really going on in there. I hope I'm wrong and things are progressing all sorts of normal. My baby calendar widgets are all over the place but I'm actually only hitting a little over 5 weeks I guess so still hoping it's just too soon to feel very different. Jeff thinks I'm a little paranoid and thinks everything is fine. Thank goodness for the voice of reason. I'm sure he is right.

A little worried...

I am beginning to worry a little bit...not much but sometimes. Jeff and I have this thing where he asks me every time he comes home from work or I get home from work if I feel pregnant today. I still don't really feel different. I'm a little tender but less so then I was before, sometimes mild cramps, tired but not exhausted and I feel like I'm cold all the time (like I could wear sweats in 70 degree weather). The good thing is I'm not spotting or anything scary so I still say that things are okay. I want to enjoy things but I'm a little paranoid. I'm paranoid if my progesterone is high enough and if my beta is still rising (UCRM never tested progesterone and only did one beta) and if my body which has obviously had it's issues/failings before is going to come through for me on this one.

In an effort to be positive and occupy my time I have added like 5 or 6 widgets to my iGoogle page regarding pregnancy and stages of development, etc. I figure this way I can weed out the ones that bore me or are not really informative. It's interesting to watch and follow where the kiddo(s) are at in development. It says the kiddo(s) are the size of a sesame seed now. They are only the size of a chocolate sprinkle when we go in for the viability u/s. Seriously a sprinkle with a heart beat...that's crazy! Looking forward to the u/s and hopefully some peace of mind...11 days to go.

Uncertain feelings...

I have been feeling confident with things until today. I've felt crampy and bloated since the transfer (all can be linked to the PIO) and soreness started before transfer with the shots so that was kinda nice in a weird way. Today I've been feeling like I don't feel any different than that and I've found it discouraging. I still hope that things work but I've felt worried and been emotional about it not. It's been fun to picture and talk with Jeff about the positive side of things. Then feelings like this come up and it feels like it's all going downhill. I said I wouldn't get nutty about the 2 week wait and I've been great until today. This sucks! Good thing school and work will be back on again tomorrow so that I'll have things to keep me busy.

Feeling Good

I've noticed with POI that I seem to have gained more weight in my middle. I've heard this is a common complaint too with POF/POI women. I think it stinks...as you can't get pregnant but you get a spare tire or other weight gaining which then leads some people to think you might be and the real morons (yes clerk at Walmart I'm thinking of you...despite it being like a year ago you bug me) to actually ask if you are. Anyway I have been trying to watch what I eat (something I've never really worried about before) and I feel like it's helping. Okay so no huge improvements but just feeling better about it. I need more dedication to get exercising too as I know that would help. That will be my next goal. Yeah me!

I am back in school (maybe I never mentioned it on this blog) but I quit my social work job due to major stress and emotional mess I became. I went back to retail part-time for work (don't get me started on how the difference in pay really sucks) and back to school. I really enjoy my classes and I love learning but I also don't like putting money into something (no matter the hopefully short term of it) when I would really rather put it into savings. Some is going to a student loan though and I will try to balance out the rest. At least we haven't used any savings so that is good. I don't know just having a feeling good about things day and it's always good to share those days.