We had our follow up with Dr H yesterday. He talked about our FET transfer and he told us that the quality on the blasts that thawed were rated as "fair" but we were likely given the higher odds by the transferring doctor due to the embryos hatching. He said something to the effect of he probably would have looked at both quality and hatching and maybe more weight should have been put on the "fair" rating. Thanks. That information would have been useful to us at the time not now morons. Makes me so mad to know we should have been advised to transfer both instead of given such high odds based on one little bit of information and not the whole picture.
The rest of the appointment had it's positives and it's negatives. The positive we came away with was that Dr H is willing to do some treatment for the autoimmune possibility (high dose steroids in the short term for 5-days and heparin or baby aspirin) and that insurance should cover the two tests he wants us to do (hysteroscopy and uterine biopsy). The uterine biopsy is more for the purpose of raising odds of implantation than for finding an autoimmune cause.
However the negative we came away with is that the quality of embryos left isn't that stellar. Dr H seemed pretty darn positive and then I reminded him that I didn't think we had any blastocysts left and so he reviewed the embryology report and some doubt crept in to even his positive outlook. He talked about how they don't even freeze morulas on day 5 anymore (they wait til day six and if they haven't developed more they discard them). In our understanding we have: two EB3, two M2 cav, one M2- cav, one M3 cav and two M2 left. He looked over the report and pointed out blasts and said he still thinks there is hope for one or two good viable chances at a live birth. Again we were reminded that they didn't know what was frozen together. Seriously that irks me and makes me so mad every time they say that. How can you not know? or make a note?
Then he talked about doing one cycle and thawing everything and looking for the very best or doing two cycles and thawing one straw at a time. We have two straws with 4 embryos in each remaining still. When he talked about thawing both straws for one cycle I knew he didn't think our odds were that great. He did end up recommending splitting it into two cycles if we could afford to because he felt it was a better chance still. Then he started asking about the possibility of three out of four surviving a thaw and what we would do or how we would feel about transferring three. Yep my "crappy odds" radar went off again. I asked him how often they consider transferring three in situations with morulas and he said that each doctor considers it depending on circumstances and in this case it would likely be considered if we wanted to. My hopes were down on the floor at this point. I didn't cry. I wanted to but I held it in. Dr H tried to pick up the tone and hopes again by saying he was still very optimistic about this still working for us. It helped but not very much.
He sent off a request to schedule the hysteroscopy in a few weeks. He said we could do the scope and biopsy together but thought it might be beneficial with timing (in case there were something to correct found with the scope) to do them separately. He mentally tried to figure out a possible timing for us...asking about my cycles and bum ovaries. Once again I guess it pays to not have your ovaries running interference on things...they can schedule the scope without much timing and move forward pretty easily. Then he said it might be tight to squeeze in a transfer before the clinic closed for the holidays. I said that was fine and I didn't want to go through a cycle during the holidays or have another disappointment during that time anyway. Wahoo for Miss Positive here huh? So at any rate we are looking to have everything line up for a January cycle at this point.
Now we just have to consider the possibilities of one cycle vs two and whether we want to take the risk (if given and no matter how slim) of having twins or even triplets. What a mess. I don't really have much hope of this working anymore. But I don't know how to not try still. In some ways I just wish I had never crawled out of my cute babies and fun toddlers pleasant little cocoon to desire any more.
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