Weathering Storms...

During the holiday season I was unfortunate to learn of two couples that I am close to announcing impending divorces.  It breaks my heart for both of them and for their families.  Neither were announcements I expected really.  One came as a complete shock to me.  An old roommate mentioned a "new place" on facebook and I assumed that this meant she had moved with her husband and little boy.  I commented about it and received an email in return from her relating the divorce news and saying "it's been a very rough and sad year for us and our marriage couldn't weather the storm".  This is one of the women I mentioned in a previous post that this time last year had lost her little girl shortly after birth.  I know this has been part of their struggles and I don't know if there have been others but I imagine this type of thing could easily do a couple in.

Weathering the storm can sometimes be the hardest thing we can call on our loved ones or spouse to do.  Some people have thunderstorms and for whatever reason others are dealt hurricanes.  And sometimes it is the perception of the person or couple involved.  They say finances is a leading reason for divorce and I can see where this would easily lead the pack.  Everyone in a marriage has to deal with this.  But what about the storms that not every couple has to deal with like infertility, loss of a child, terminal illness, life altering challenges, etc.  I think of these as faith questioning trials.  I know not everyone goes into marriage with a religious aspect but I know a lot of us do.  And like finances I think this is even harder to find someone on the same page and depth as you are.  Then you throw in a big storm and you kind of wonder if you'll ever be on the same level again.

I know for Jeff and I that this was probably the biggest area of our life that has been affected.  We were pretty active in our church going into marriage and did the things we should but as my infertility diagnosis became more drastic and certain this became harder to maintain.  These have probably been the most heated discussions and disagreements we have had also and if there is anything that has ever made me question the strength of my marriage to overcome something it would to overcome these differences of opinion we now have.  But we've been weathering our storm (heck maybe it's even past) and fixing up the damage that the winds and rains caused.  I think we are in a good place and I am grateful that at least at this point in our marriage and life together we have weathered the storm and pulled through to be stronger.