Parenting Blahs and Awwwwws...

Maybe I've been over critical of my parenting now that we are taking on the task of trying to add another one (or two) to the family.  I sometimes feel like how can I consider adding one when I can't handle the two I have.  Yesterday was that day.  I felt like a crappy parent yesterday.  I don't know if it's the stress of the cycle or the extra estrogen floating in my bloodstream but I was a cranky little beast.  My wonderful toddlers were getting into mischief left and right.  We went to a playgroup in our neighborhood and I felt hopeful in getting to know my neighbors and isolated at the same time.  It helped to get out but I didn't return home all positive either.  I did what I tend to do when I feel cranky and want a break...through on some TV and distracted myself with some computer time.  Kendall crashed on the couch and Seren laughed at cartoons.  Then they were both awake and picking on each other for laughs.  Okay more like laughs for one and tears for the other.  This is their schtick lately...taking turns tormenting each other.  Needless to say lots of time outs and apologies have happened.

This time they both ended up in time out in their room.  A few minutes later the curtains and light-weight curtain rod came crashing down.  I got mad, swatted them on the butt and left them crying while I took my own time out (I always feeling like a stinker myself when I resort to any spanking).  Afterward, I stood them side by side and gave them a stern talk.  I tried to clear up who had pulled down the curtain and if both helped.  I still wasn't happy but at least I was calm.  At the end of the little talk I noticed that they had been holding hands between them.  They owned up to making a mistake and held hands while mom gave them the run down on not pulling down curtains and goofing off.  It was a cute little moment and reminder of their innocence to see them stick together.  

And hey today has been sooooo much better.  I've held onto some positive parenting.  I've gotten hugs from front and back at the same time from both my girls.  Running hugs.  Sitting hugs and double sitting hugs.  Maybe I'm not a terrible stinker of a parent in the long haul after all.  I love my girls.  So grateful that children are so forgiving and "forgetful" of our short comings as parents.