19 Months

Foods They Like:  They love almost all fruit.  They love cheese, ham fried rice, minestrone soup, pizza, zucchini bread, pancakes, chicken nuggets, etc.  They are getting better with vegetables (especially if it's mixed in with other things) mostly corn, tomatoes and carrots. 

Foods They Don't:  Avocado, olives, and a lot of vegetables still.  

Favorite Things:   They love splashing in puddles, going on walks (stroller or on foot), dogs of all sizes.  They like bath time and stories.  Playing in the back yard and with bugs and dirt.  They love playing with cousins.  Seren is especially interested in Abby (4 months older than the girls) and will stare at her and follow her around when they come visiting.
Favorite toy:  Tunnel from ikea.  Water with buckets and toys.
Dislikes:  Being hungry and tired.  Helping them eat...they very much want to do it all on their own.
Their Accomplishments:  Walking and running.  Stairs up and down although we still leave the gate up on the big stairs.  Understanding and talking more.  We're working on body parts and they are learning more of those.

Verbal:  They are talking and imitating more.  New words: juice, up, doggie and yes.  Seren seems to talk more but Kendall can really get going as well. 

Teeth:  Seren has four on top, four on bottom and four molars.  Kendall has four on bottom, four on top and two molars.  

Sleep:  They fight sleeping a little more but have each other for company or the other will usually sleep through if a fit is being thrown. 
Looking forward to:  Looking forward to more words and verbal skills.  They understand so much and are starting to catch onto speaking better.  Still looking forward to being on our own again, especially so I can have more control over diet, groceries and freezer meals. 

Sunny Days...

We are enjoying our share of sunny days here recently.  It is better than winter and snow and being cooped up inside.  Although some really hot days have kept us inside anyway.  There isn't much going on here.  I have been flying solo with the girls the last few days as Grandparents D have been watching other grandkids.  Jeff is also out of town for the same few days + one and the girls have been sick for the last week or two (just the sniffles and improving) so it hasn't been the best timing.  I was up with Seren from 3:30 am to 7 am one night/morning with Kendall joining in around 6 am.  Thank goodness they slept in until 11 am that day.  After that it has been all uphill though.  And we have partial word on the short sale being good news soon so that doesn't hurt the optimism.  Generally speaking though this summer has been full of sunny days, smiles and moments like these.

Kendall playing in the background while mom plays with her camera settings to capture the cuteness

(reminds me of pictures my dad took when we were little)

Seren loves to corner Thor at the front door when he's looking outside.  He actually didn't mind this time and started licking her hand (they are going to be good buddies when she's a little bigger)

Kind of Solution

After I purchased some plastic stroller type buckles on eBay...I found a perfectly fine solution at the thrift store.  I thrift my girls clothes.  I love it!  It's like a bargain hunt to find a cute (basically new looking) shirt for $1 or $2 and pants for $3.  I figure until they are old enough to take better care of their clothes (or at least not stain them over and over with spaghetti and strawberries, etc) then it is perfectly fine, great even, to get used clothes.  Goodness sounds like I could do a whole post on that.

Anyway I found a cargo type belt (1 1/2" wide with a double ring closure).  It was $0.69 and booyah also the 50% off color tag of the day.  So I bought it as a temporary fix.  We even took it for a practice run to the store.  I sat Seren in the basket again and looped the belt around her snugged it up on the outside so she couldn't mess with it.  She didn't like it.  In fact I think she was darn near pissed off about it.  At first she was really trying to fight it and stand up (not a chance).  Then she gave up and just whined about it a little.  I got a few sideways glances while she was freaking out but hey I prevented a concussion so who cares.

I am hoping the next trip to try it out won't be so troublesome.  It was the middle of nap time today and we had a super rough night as well.  Seren is not always the twin in the basket either but Kendall was half-asleep when we got to the store so I didn't want to chance her cranking out.

**Update:  The buckles I ordered never came.  I checked on tracking and the stupid company sent them to my old address...despite me updating the address with them and them sending me an email saying they'd send it to my current address.  Grrrrrrrr!  The belt has worked fine though despite the fact if the girl in the basket gets fussy that people notice more.  Come on people...I dare you to ask me why I use something to belt them in! Bring it!

Shopping Cart Rant...

I am on a mission to make shopping safer for my girls.  Shopping goes something like this for me:  one girl goes in the basket seat (always belted in) and one girl is placed in the cart and reminded repeatedly to sit down and forced to sit down and reminded again.  Sometimes if they are restless enough I will hold this one on my hip and steer with one hand.  Fun shopping trip let me tell ya.  Yep some stores have double seated carts and I can tell you that I haven't had the luxury of shopping at one recently.  And the stores that have them often don't have enough and they are used up (sometimes by single child shoppers...grrrrrrr!!)  No offense to anyone who shops with one child and throws them in the "fun" cart with the car on the front or such but come on people some of us actually need a cart that fits two kiddos.  Grrrrrr I say again.  And some two seaters aren't even fit or meant for smaller toddlers.  Case in point Target store two seaters in our area have a basic box that you can strap two kids into and I've used one and felt like my girls were going to fall out.  Not to mention the dang cart is a royal pain to maneuver.  Ughhhh!  And this doesn't even bring up the fact sooooo many have broken or missing seat belts.  Seriously?!

Today was my last straw though.  The girls and I went to Target to get my prescriptions and due to my above stated hatred of their two seaters I opted to put them in a cart.  Kendall sat belted in the basket seat and Seren in the cart.  Seren loves to stand up and I repeatedly placed her on her bum and told her to sit.  And she would almost immediately stand up again and grin at me.  She knew I didn't want her to stand but she didn't understand why.  Not until it was too late.  We were at the prescription pick up counter and Seren was standing in the cart that wasn't moving, the pharmacy tech asked me a question and I moved the cart to hear her and out toppled Seren.  Flat on her back on the hard tile of the store.  I dropped everything in my hands and picked her up in an instant.  I couldn't have felt more guilty.  I was beyond grateful and a little embarrassed when she clutched me and started wailing.  I looked her over for injuries and apologized to her over and over for being a moron of a  mother.  Things happen.  I am so grateful she wasn't seriously hurt.  And now, researching an idea to make a seatbelt for the cart, and reading about the number of children who end up in emergency rooms from similar falls (from the cart or basket seat) I am even more grateful she is okay and also embarrassed that I let it happen. 

Yes I'm the moron who let it happen.  But I'm still pissed off at stores for having very little or poor solutions to the problem (especially when twins are so much more prevalent these days).

Don't let kids stand up in carts...ever (moving or not).  Find a better way.  When I find or invent my better way I will let you know.  Until then I will be shopping with our stroller or in the hours that hubby can keep one or both girls at home.

July 4th, The Zoo and Our Monkeys...

Just wanted to share some recent stories with the girls (mostly for my own good).  We enjoyed a great 4th of July this year.  We are still living with my in-laws (hoping for a resolution on this short sale in the next month or so and closing the month after...we'll see).  So anyway we walked to the park near their home about a mile or so away and enjoyed some accapella performers...okay somewhat.  The girls got restless and didn't want to sit still.  On one occasion at picking up and redirecting Seren she must have gotten frustrated because she bit my shoulder...hard, leaving a bruise as of today.  She felt bad afterwords and starting bawling when I handed her off to Jeff.  But after that we decided it was best to leave Jeff's family and let the girls roam around on the grass.  When it got darker we attempted to rejoin the family but it wasn't to be.  We threw Kendall and Seren into the stroller and walked them around the park, actually ending up in the perfect spot for the fireworks by accident.  They enjoyed them.  Seren was a little nervous of the cherry bomb type and clung to me a few times.  But eventually they both loved them.  They stared at the sky with wonder and pointed to them and babbled.  It was adorable.

Seren sitting on Grandma D

Patriotic Kendall - I LOVE this picture

4th of July Firework watching (poor camera = poor picture)

Also we recently took Seren and Kendall to the zoo with the grandparents.  They also enjoyed this much more than they did last year, as you would expect.  They stared at animals and laughed when we could find one close enough to a window to watch (orangutan and polar bear).  We even tried to get them to talk to the monkeys by imitating a monkey.  Seren didn't care but Kendall caught right on and copied us with some higher pitched "ooohhh ahhhh ahhhh" sound making.  It was so funny.  I wish we would have gotten it on video. 

At the zoo...enjoying themselves despite the heat (can you tell I don't bring my good camera on outtings haha)

I think they are starting to catch onto verbalizing a little better.  I still worry they are behind but hopefully they will be talking our ears off soon.  You can definitely hear them trying to imitate what we say to them though so that is a great jumping off point I'm sure.

18 Months

Height/Weight:  Kendall: 32.76 inches (81%), 20 lb 11 oz (6%)...yeah! she hit the chart again and 46.1 cm head circ (38%).  Seren: 31.85 inches (57%), 21 lb 14.5 oz (16%) and 47.7 cm head circ (81%).  Seren was freaking out at being measured so her's may be off somewhat. 

Eating:  They eat 3 meals a day and a snack before afternoon nap and an hour or so before dinner.  They are starting to use their utensils fairly well...pasta, oatmeal, applesauce (I really need to let go on the mess it makes haha)

Foods They Like:  They are doing better about being picky (I think...depends on the day).  They love almost all fruit including prunes and grapefruit juice (thanks Grandma and Grandpa D haha).  They like some veggies okay...carrots, tomatoes, zucchini, etc.  They love ham fried rice, pizza, zucchini bread, pancakes, and their new favorite is this pasta dish (tomatoes and all), etc.  

Foods They Don't:  broccoli, avocado, etc. 

Favorite Things:  They love being at Grandma and Grandpa's house (the extra attention).  They love going outside and playing in the water (Seren literally begs me to dump water on her).  They love the dog...they both chase after him trying to hug or kiss him.  They play well together.  Kendall is starting to pick up on Seren's assertiveness and pushes Seren out of the way if she picks on her (somewhat happy she's sticking up for herself with Seren now but we still correct them both for pushing, etc).  Kendall loves hair things and insists on having them in her hair despite the fact it is taking it's sweet time growing.

Dislikes:  Being hungry and tired.  Getting into trouble or being told "no".  Teething for Seren (3 molars at once poor kid).

Their Accomplishments:  They both go up and down stairs pretty well.  Such a relief.  They are walking and nearly running now.  They talk but not nearly like the books and checklists say they should (10-20 words by 18 months).  They say a handful of words...picking up on "doggie", "boo" and "water" (I think).  They understand so many words though which is great.  Seren became interested in the grown-up toilet a week or so ago and I showed them both how it worked/flushed.  Then we've been offering to let them use the grown-up toilet before bathtime (with a training seat) and Seren has peed a couple times on it.  I am not toilet training but want them to get used to the idea and not be scared of it (plus hoping to avoid training potties and as much clean up).

Teeth:  Kendall has three on bottom, four on top and two left molars (weird order to her teeth).  Seren has four bottom, four on top and four molars (three cutting right now and one mostly in; gotten them in standard order).

Our Accomplishments:  Usually on a good schedule.  We take them out with us whenever we need to.  We still work well together.  

Sleep:  They sleep 12-13 hours at night and one 2 hour nap.  Routine has been key to this.  They usually are in bed by 7:30 pm.  But they hate to sleep at night if they know a "party" is going on (so Sunday nights with family dinners they usually don't sleep until 8:30 or 9:00p).

Looking forward to:  Full confidence in the stairs (although I'm sure there will still be topples).  Their being able to feed themselves better without mess making.  Hoping for better eating habits too.  We are also still sitting on the short sale we made an offer on so really hoping to get the go ahead on this soon (at least another 3 weeks out we're told : P yuck)

Seren hiding behind a chair 

 Kendall getting ready to run through sprinklers

 Letting go of control...

...so far it's been very messy :) haha

Having it all...

How can I possibly want more when I already have it all?  That is the question that keeps running through my mind this morning.  Jeff and I decided that we would have our "discussion" this week while his parents are away so that we don't have to worry about them over hearing things.  Decisions.  Real decisions.  I don't know.  I feel like I don't even know what I want anymore.  For so many months I felt so strongly that I wanted to have one more baby.  And as the girls have been growing and we've been enjoying them so much I keep thinking...what if that throws things off?  What if this happy equilibrium that we are at right now is not so perfect once we throw in a third child?  Right now I picture us growing up together with these beautiful girls and daddy daughter dates and times where we can split them up between us and get lots of one-on-one time with them.  Would that be so easy if there were a third?  But I also think of how much I have wanted more kids in the past and if maybe I'm just scared to try again.  I think of our frozen embryos.  Possibilities of life put on hold.  Waiting.  Waiting for us to make decisions.  What if in the eternal scheme of things I let them down?  What if we make a decision and later regret it?  It's not like we can go back and do this all over again.  The cost alone would be a big enough deterrent much less all the genetic connection and such that I would want another child to have also.

What if we decide to try to have another child and it doesn't work?  What if we (or maybe just I) get my hopes wrapped up in the process again and we don't get pregnant?  What if it changes my 70/30 split towards having another child into a 99/1 split and Jeff doesn't want to try again.  Do I leave myself more open for heartache?  I don't know.

I think a lot too of the couples that we could help.  We are satisfied and happy with our life and could give soooo much happiness to someone else.  I think of friends and acquaintances that I know who struggle with infertility.  I know how hard it is and the memory of that kind of heartache is still fresh when I look back on it.  I know (or at least I believe) that it would make me just as happy to have someone with infertility succeed at having a child with our embryos as it would for me to have another child.  Although I do have some worry that I might be a little envious at the same time.  I think the overwhelming feeling would be happiness for them and for that child...that life that was created for the purpose of being born and living.

I have been trying to think and look into all aspects.  I've talked to our clinic about our choices and I've been reading on the Miracles Waiting website and I've been thinking and trying to feel out how I feel about having another child.  I would love another baby.  But I also love the babies (who aren't so much babies anymore) that we have.  I honestly just haven't come to a decision still and while Jeff has mostly come to his decision he isn't completely opposed to another if it's what I want.  I kind of just feel like there isn't a right or wrong answer to this.  Which is making this decision so hard to try to make.  The debate goes on for now.